I have no idea where I am going in life and its absolutely terrifying. Everyone around me has their future jobs planned out and some of them even have plan Bs, and I'm just treading water. I'm on the fence about everything and I never know whether I'm making the right decision. I always feel guilty about every choice I make and the constant worrying is tearing me down, so much so I cannot bring myself to appreciate anything happening now.
I'm trying to plan something for my birthday, I haven't done anything like that in years mainly because I never felt the need to celebrate me dragging myself through another year. I'm not really getting anywhere with the planning, it's stressing me out too and it's not supposed to.
Why do we have to decide what we want to be for the rest of our lives now? I don't even know whether I want to live.
I need to get the worry out of my mind, it's always there, gnawing, nagging, it's just exhausting. I'm always tired now, I'm going back down to where I used to be.
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